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Saturday, November 3, 2007


Trick or treat

Every once in a while I need a treat. It’s not that I have been good and deserving one like a dog. I have in fact been grumbling a lot lately, not very appreciative. The old “trickster” is shaking my leg. I’ve been feeling like there’s a heavy load on my back and I’m walking up hill backwards so I can’t see where I’m going and no end in sight. As hard as I push and pray, I get nowhere fast. The only place I get is to another day that is not much different. That was until we decided to go to town to visit family and walk amongst the parade of “trick or treaters” on Halloween afternoon. Our grandson was more into people watching and playing with leaves, and watching him was a pleasure.

But then this pleasant delight did not last very long. On the way back to the Islands, we missed the last ferry and had to get a motel room for the night and rise early for the 5:30 am boat. I was a little upset as I was tired and should have double checked the ferry schedule instead of relying on my husband who read it wrong.

I am looking for that great feeling that lasts longer than a day. I think that heavy load on my back is keeping me from seeing the daily delights around me. My mind does not see what is ahead and I don’t really want to look at where I’ve been. I realize that my burden is caused by rebellion. I resist dying to my old ways of doing things. I know I want to be all God wants for me, and as a result God has been changing me, but I really am struggling with letting it happen. As a result, I make it harder on myself such as walking up hill backwards. But finally this week I realize that all I have to do is confess my rebellion, turn completely around and walk hand in hand with my Lord and Savior up the hill. He knows the way and points out the pleasures and takes the load from my back. I do long to be free, the most wonderful feeling of all. He’s picked up the tab of my rebellion and treats me with care and consideration every day and I am grateful once again for the treat of grace that lasts a lifetime.

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